There are a lot of things that suck about being basically a one-person company. The most obvious is of course that all the responsibilities fall on one shoulder (or pair of shoulders, unless you’ve had one of your shoulders surgically removed, and that seems unlikely). The point is that one person is in charge of advertising, accounting, order fulfillment, cranky customers, packaging, shipping, and so on. I don’t care what they tell you in business school about the thrill of being your own boss—it sucks.
There are, however, a few definite advantages, and one of them is that decisions can be made on the spur of the moment. In a larger company, any decisions usually need to be run by at least a half-dozen people, many of whom may object to a self-evidently great idea for any number of reasons: because it wasn’t their idea; because they’re coming off their meds; because they are disinterested, hate their jobs, are clandestine saboteurs, or any number of other reasons. As a one-man operation, however, I don’t have to answer to anyone (except the people I owe money to), and thus can do whatever the hell I like.
Thus, as president and janitor of Balls Out Entertainment (and creator of the world’s first satirical board game of religious warfare, Playing Gods: The Board Game of Divine Domination), I’m pleased to announce a special, limited-time promotion to help in Haiti’s disaster relief. Millions have been raised, but the country is in shambles and much more help is needed.
From now through February 15, 2010, all of the profits from sales of Playing Gods games and merchandise will be donated to Doctors Without Borders, via the Secular Humanist Aid and Relief Effort (S.H.A.R.E.). That’s right, 100%—none of this “30% goes to expenses” crap. Every cent of profit from game sales (minus Paypal and postage fees) will be donated to one of the world’s most respected relief organizations.
Payments will be calculated and donated to S.H.A.R.E. by February 20, and a copy of the check posted on the Playing Gods Web site. Just in case you need some encouragement, I will happily autograph each board game as well, and throw in a free Expansion Pack ($5 value).
Does the creator of this blasphemous indie board game need your money? Of course I do.
But the people in Haiti need it more. I’m happy breaking even on the deal. I don’t see pikers at Milton Bradley, Hasbro, or Parker Bros. donating jack squat!
What do you say? If you donate money, I’ll donate my games and time. It’s like buying a game at half price and donating $20 to charity at the same time. You get an autographed Playing Gods game and Haitians get desperately-needed money via a skeptic / humanist charity. Everybody wins.
You can order at http://www.playinggods.com. You don’t need any special code: all profits from anything you buy between now and Feb. 20 will be donated. If you’d like to inquire about bulk orders, you can contact me at email@example.com.
Department of Offense